So my boss just came over and said “do you like Oreos? I bought them in the vending machine by accident” !!!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!
Kick Puncher: The Last Kickening
Mickey has nephews, Donald has nephews, Goofy has a son.
And he wasn’t adopted, he looks just like him.
Goofy……has had sex.
Goofy…..has known a woman biblically….
Imagine what it must’ve looked like.
Imagine what it sounded like.
These are the things I think about when I wake up in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat.
Combination laughing/sobbing at this.
it’s ironic how middle school boys will make fun of the gay kid but then draw dicks on literally everything
finish this sentence: m
y body craves for the touch of mashed potatoes, the soft white flesh of the vegetable sliding over my body. i havent slept in fifteen days. only the beautiful rapturous gooey white semi solid plant matter inspires me to continue living. sometimes i like to imagine that the mashed potatoes have accepted me as their loving partner. oh can i dream.
What the actual fuck
If you’re pregnant, don’t take sexy photos. Have some self-respect for the baby at least
it’s my birthday tomorrow…this seems pretty accurate